The Most Beautiful Conversation with My Daughter

Parenthood comes with moments of joy, challenges, and invaluable life lessons. One of my most memorable conversations happened with my daughter, Imole—a conversation that reminded me of the power of gratitude and perspective.

A Special Bond with Mama

Imole, my first child, carries traits that remind me so much of my dear mother-in-law. Those who know me well understand how much I adore my mother-in-law—she’s not just family but my bestie.

I didn’t start having children until after 17 years of marriage. My mother-in-law’s unwavering prayers and understanding during those years made her an anchor in my life. Our bond grew stronger despite our cultural differences—I’m from Edo State, born in Lagos, while Mama hails from Ondo State. She loved pounded yam and Egusi soup, but I, on the other hand, couldn’t stand pounding yam (mio o mo yan gun)! Convincing her to join me in enjoying Poundo Yam instead was one of our shared jokes.

Mama stayed with me for two years when I finally had my first child, Imole. She brought her habits with her, like taking tea so thick it required eight full spoons of Milo. Even at over 70 years old, her tea preference remained unchanged. Imole, who adored Mama, adopted her love for thick tea.

Adjusting to the Times

Fast forward to now: our family has grown to include my twins, Oluwadamilohun and Oluwadamilola, and my nephew, Farihan. Times have changed, and like many Nigerians, we’ve had to adjust to rising costs, including those brought about by economic changes under Baba Tinubu’s administration.

I instructed our housekeeper to reduce the Milo servings to two spoons per cup for everyone. But for Imole, this was an emotional adjustment. She was used to her thick tea and would often request extra Milo, and I’d give in to see her smile.

One day, however, we ran out of Milo entirely. Imole, holding her cup, came to me with tears welling up. “Mummy, this Milo is watery,” she said, on the verge of crying. With no extra packet to save the day, I decided it was time for a heart-to-heart talk.

The Conversation That Changed Everything

I knelt to her level and gently asked,
Mummy: “Imole, do you remember those kids we saw begging on the road the other day? You even asked me to give one of them money.”
Imole: “Yes, mummy.”
Mummy: “Do you know why they beg? Some don’t have a mummy or daddy to care for them. They may have no food, no tea, nothing. Their mummies might have gone back to God, and they’ll never see her again. But you, my darling, have your mummy, tea, and food daily. So, instead of saying it’s watery, learn to say, ‘Thank you, mummy,’ and also thank Mahanta (that is like saying thank God, Jesus, or Allah depending on your religion.)

I left her to get her brother ready, and a few minutes later, Imole returned with her empty cup. She smiled and said, “Mummy, thank you! I’ve taken my tea, and I also said thank you to Mahanta.”

It was one of the most beautiful moments I’ve shared with my daughter—a reminder that children, no matter how young, can understand gratitude and humility when we take the time to teach them.

A Lesson for Us All

As parents, we often feel pressured to satisfy our kids’ desires. But it’s not about giving them everything—it’s about teaching them the value of what they have. Gratitude is a lesson that shapes their hearts and prepares them to face life with grace and resilience.

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